In Catilinam
by toitsu
Summary: Kind of like juggling chisels in total darkness. Grimmjow X Ulquiorra, some Grimmjow X Ichigo, minor onesided Ulquiorra x Yoruichi.


**Affectionate**

When Grimmjow has his arm cut off, Ulquiorra wastes his time cursing the idiot with more words than necessary, and with less impassiveness than intended, and it's a bit infuriating when Grimmjow just flashes him a cocky smirk.

**Aftermath**

If he ever bothered to look, the only thing he would see would be Grimmjow's retreating backs anyway.

**Anchor**

He doesn't get attached easily, and his interests are short-lived, and it gets harder to find excuses as he walks through Ulquiorra's doors for the thirty seventh time.

**Averting**

Grimmjow doesn't (want to) care about Ulquiorra, and that's why he's rough and does vicious things and pretends Ulquiorra doesn't trash around in pain, and he can't quite meet Ulquiorra's gaze as he feels blood pooling on the pristine sheets.

**Beginning**

It starts with harsh kiss – kiss not meant to comfort, please, kiss meant to challenge and hurt – and hands that wander hungrily over his body, and he can't recall the moment when it has all changed to something deeper.

**Blind**

Screwing around with Grimmjow is kind of like juggling chisels in total darkness: blind, stupid, pointless and a disaster _begging_ to happen.

**Cat**

Something about this woman reminds him of Grimmjow – perhaps becuase it seems that no matter what she does, air doesn't seem bothered by her presence, almost as if she was a cat, just like Grimmjow used to be.

**Choices**

They are all gathered here, aims that interfere, and as air is tensing between them, Grimmjow chooses to fight Shinigami boy, and refuses to look directly into Ulquiorra.

**Cigar**

Ulquiorra looks downright hot with a cigar between his spindly fingers; until Grimmjow notices smoke escaping Ulquiorra's hole, that is, and his laughter echoes through empty corridors.

**Color**

The absence of color in this place tires him, so first time he spots the Fourth Espada, he is mesmerized by absurd color of his eyes, and even when they are closed, he gazes at lines adorning Ulquiorra's pale cheeks.

**Dance**

What Ulquiorra hates is the way he changes for Grimmjow – his feet follow the rhythm of blue-haired Espada's heartbeats as he learns steps in their awkward dance.

**Dominance**

No, submitting to the other is not the hardest thing to do (not that they do so easily); no, it's admitting they enjoy it, it's holding back moans and begging and _Please don't stop._

**Equal**

There is no real difference between fucking and fighting, with clothes torn and discarded, and blood spilt, drank and dried, with scenery that matches either of bloodsheds, with hands that know to hurt only, and lips dry and thin and unpleasant (much like themselves) and with outcome that is always the same, leaving them spent and tangled and gasping for air.

**Falling**

They made no promises, and with his fooling around with Shinigami boy, he has no right to complain, but as Ulquiorra spends more time babysitting that woman, he feels something heavy, suffocating and painful throbing in his hollow chest.

**Fuck-poker**

He isn't really surprised when he notices deck of cards in Grimmjow's hand and he immediately claims he won't play strip-poker (again) but Grimmjow grins wider as he explains just what kind of poker he wants to play, and Ulquiorra feels his cheek heat just a little.

**Grind**

Since he captured that woman, he learnt she was the very epitome of damsel in distress; as Grimmjow is getting rid of him to fight her knight, he is not worried (perhaps a bit annoyed) because he doesn't doubt that _his _damsel can eat a knight and a horse and his shiny shiny armor.

**Hole**

It is a weird sensation, Grimmjow's chest sliding against his, and the lack of contact where Grimmjow's hole is, and Ulquiorra can't quite decide whether he likes it or not, and it gets even weirder when Grimmjow is taking him from behind.

**Ice**

Hueco Mundo is a cold place, and antiseptic whiteness of Las Noches even more so, but Ulquiorra has yet to find something colder than the color of Grimmjow's hair.

**Immersed**

While taking care of the woman, Ulquiorra idly wonders what is it about Shinigami boy that makes everyone inexplicibly drawn to him, and is he going to be caught in the same web as Grimmjow.

**Lost**

Perhaps if she wasn't siding with trash, he would even consider trying to get close to the cat woman.

**Memento**

Ulquiorra's hair reminds him of darkness and shadows in times before Aizen – times of hiding and seeking and constant need to get stronger and constant fear of degrading; he burries his face in black strands scatterd over pillows and for a moment, his happier life revives behind his closed eyelids.

**Needs**

Grimmjow only ever approaches him when he has urges; and (the good thing is) it happens often.

**Nothingness**

It is simple mathematics: you can add zero to zero and it will still be zero; but somehow, with Ulquiorra on his side, Grimmjow feels less phantom.

**Orange**

There is clearly too much orange between them – orange in different shades and lenghts that trap them in this distorted quadrangle where some chase everyone and some chase no one.

**Pervert**

Grimmjow is a pervert and likes to experiment and Ulquiorra usually doesn't mind, but when Grimmjow wants to take him on a table in a meeting room twenty minutes before a meeting, well (no matter how alluring Grimmjow makes it sound), Ulquiorra is forced to draw a line.

**Pet**

Ulquiorra and Shinigami boy are a little bit alike: they fight back and are unwilling to submit and provide a challenge for him, but unlike Ulquiorra, the boy is fragile and Grimmjow treats him more gentle because he doesn't want his toy to break (yet).

**Posion**

It's not jealousy he feels as Grimmjow chases after that Shinigami boy again, so he doesn't understand the little twinge of hate, relief, possessiveness that poisons his chest as the boy is lying broken before him.

**Rumors**

When they see him limping again, they will say he's been Aizen-sama's fuck-toy again (when he's not around, of course); he lets them believe in it because he would rather have them speculate about him and Aizen than have them know he submits to Grimmjow instead.

**Skin**

It's hard to break this skin, even to an Espada, but Grimmjow knows that, with time, iron can rust.

**Sleeping**

Animation is what makes Grimmjow stunning – that ceaseless energy vibrating in every inch of his body; when he sleeps, however, he's unusually still and cold and Ulquiorra doesn't find him attractive at all.

**Substitute**

The landscape of Hueco Mundo is, well, _void_, and for lack of better things to break, they tear each other instead.

**Surprise**

When Aizen directs a knowing smirk towards him, Ulquiorra doesn't feel as embarrased as he thought he would be.

**Teeth**

He wants nothing more than to rip Grimmjow's mask off as he feels it pressing into his backs and knowing it will leave mark clearer than anything else Grimmjow had done.

**Unconscious**

Ulquiorra makes up for all the rigidness and indifference when he's awake in his sleep: he squirms a lot, and sometimes talks in a language Grimmjow doesn't recognize, and his face isn't as expressionless, and Grimmjow would find it more amusing if Ulquiorra stopped randomly hitting everything in his vicinity, Grimmjow included.

**Voice**

Everything Grimmjow does is loud, and his voice promises to deafen everyone around; except when he's beneath Ulquiorra, when he stubbornly refuses to open his mouth.

**Wedding**

He doesn't understand why is Ulquiorra wearing that ridiculous white dress that doesn't fit him at all or where the hell are all those kids coming from (kids with green eyes and blue hair) or why are there so many flowers and why are there rings; when he wakes up and realizes it's all been a dream, he is surprised when instead of relief, he feels like crying for the first time in longer than he can remember.

**Yoruichi**

He is just a tiny bit thankful to Yammy who demanded to know who those people were, because now he has a name that goes with her face, and he kind of likes the way her name rolls off his tongue.

**Zany**

The only person he respects is Aizen-sama, but he doesn't really _care_ about him; and he definitely doesn't care for animals, but it seems that two cats managed to get under his skin, just a little.


End file.
